| Language Advice
Draft Chapter from Planned Book on Self-publishing
Language Advice
&
Style Suggestions
Never trust any style book other than Strunk & White. Nearly every modern style book will let you down. Strunk & White's Elements of Style is small. It does not take long to read. Keep it within reach.
If you want to be published by a mainstream book publisher, you must adhere religiously to the rules of Chicago Manual of Style.
Grammar standards are low at periodicals like newspapers and magazines, biggest names included.
East, Shoots, and Leaves is a best-selling grammar guide. I found five grammar errors in the Preface. I did not finish the book. Where were the editors? Did the editors not know these were errors?
I took a course for certification as a teacher of English as a second language. Both our textbooks had numbers of grammar errors. Only two of us knew. Recently graduated English majors did not know.
Anything on grammar and usage by Bill Walsh, William Safire, Edwin Newman, or Patricia O'Connor is good.
William Zinsser's On Writing Well is mandatory for writers who would write well.
Patricia O'Connor's Woe Is I will help you keep beside/besides, bi/semi, can/may and may/might straight.
No grammarian is perfect. When writing his newspaper column on grammar and language, Safire turned imperfection to his advantage. He called his readers the Lexicographic Irregulars. Safire published their corrections of his errors. Everyone had a great time. Did Safire plant errors?
Of perfect English, Mark Twain said, "The thing does not exist." None of this excuses ignorance.
1. When a person stands, they are erect is incorrect. A person cannot be they.
When a person stands he is erect.
In this usage, the pronoun he is gender neutral. Feminists err here. This is not sexist. Do not be insecure.
In their excellent How Not to Write a Novel, Howard Mittelmark and Sandra Newman use her. If you write fiction, you need this book.
2. Charles's dog...not Charles' dog....
James's cat...not James' cat....
Murdock's cabin is correct.
John's shoe is correct.
The Smiths' garage....
When in doubt consult Strunk & White.
3. Presently means soon. Now is at present. Internet grammar sources slip on this one.
4. A general consensus of opinion is a consensus.
5. At this point in time is an Al Gore-ism. At this point.... Note the period after the ellipsis...four dots, not three.
6. A troop is a group. An individual is a trooper.
7. They scratched their nose is incorrect. Did all have the same nose? They scratched their noses.
8. I graduated from high school is incorrect. Students do not graduate. Schools graduate students. I was graduated from high school. Language purists watch for this one. Internet grammar sources slip here as well.
9. Write in active voice. To the extent possible, speak in active voice. Some Microsoft Word programs help by underlining passive voice sentences or phrases.
10. Unless the rhythm and flow of sentences require contractions, do not use contractions. On the other hand, written conversations without contractions seem stiff and unnatural. Use contractions cautiously.
11. Do not fret over who & whom. That battle is lost. A well placed whom looks good. Do it right where you can do it right without sounding stiff. Who is the subject of a sentence, whom the object. Who did it to whom.
12. Its is the possessive of it. It's is the contraction of it is.
13. I am a person that does something is incorrect. You are a person who does something. She is a person who writes well. No person thats anything. Note I invented a verb.
14. I remember him going to the party is incorrect. I remember his going to the party. I remember John being scolded is incorrect. I remember John's being scolded.
A gerund is a verb converted to a noun by adding ing. Use a possessive noun or pronoun before a gerund.
There is a way to correct the him/his error with a comma, but meanings change. Do not use it.
15. The word and is not your friend. And deceives writers into run-on sentences. And is toxic.
16. Do not use big words to try to sound intelligent or educated. The simplest word is best.
17. Adjectives and adverbs are poison. Modify a noun or verb with an adjective or adverb when modification is critical to your point. In most cases, a noun or verb conveys your meaning.
18. Very is very weak. Purge the very word from your vocabulary. [Very weak humor there]
19. Drape is a verb. Long curtains are draperies. Draperies drape. English purists lurk behind the arras. [More very weak humor]
20. Hopefully is an adverb. Hopefully, the package will come today is wrong.
I hope...we hope...she hopes...one hopes...they hope...John hopes...the class hopes the package will come today. She waited hopefully for the postman. She looked hopefully at the teacher.
Hopefully is difficult to use well. Trash it with very.
21. We raise animals. We rear children.
22. It is better to under-comma than to over-comma. Commas clutter.
23. You may invent verbs. I made a verb of that in a sentence above. Do not overdo it.
24. Reread what you write. Remove the wherever possible. Note how your writing strengthens with fewer thes. Remove a wherever possible.
25. One writing guru says never use parentheses. Another says never use italics. I need both.
26. Sue visited Jane and I is wrong. Sue did not visit I. Sue visited me. Sue visited Jane and me.
27. If you use your for you're, you are beyond help.
28. If you use theirs for there's, there is no hope for you.
29. Sue and myself went to lunch is wrong. Myself never went anywhere. Sue and I went to lunch. This is another example of sounding ignorant by trying to sound refined.
30. Problematic is problematic. Dump problematic with hopefully and very.
31. Each and every is each. Every is redundant here.
32. Infinitives may be split.
Some grammar errors result from well-meant efforts of the Politically Correct and Feminists. Debrett's new guide to good manners by the infallible John Morgan deplores Political Correctness.
An educated, well-spoken person does not need to Politically Correct language to be polite. Political Correctness degrades - debases - what Churchill called the majesty of the English language. Standards slip. This is partially a problem of inadequate vocabulary, partially the result of lack of education. In polite society, Political Correctness makes a speaker/writer seem untutored.
These common errors make writers seem common. Education has broader meaning than years spent in classrooms.
If you find errors here, contact me immediately!
Caveat
If you plan to publish, learn all you can about publishing companies. Publishers - self-publishing and traditional - can seem less than honorable. Read fine print carefully. Read fine print carefully.
Professional standards plummet. Check everything twice, twice. Check everything again.
Caveat Emptor. Caveat Emptor. Caveat Emptor.
©2009 Marcus Henderson Wilder All Publication Rights Retained by Author Forwarding Between Friends Encouraged
|
